Trump’s Birthday Party Surprise
In Minnesota a right-wing evangelist
Dressed as a Marlboro County Cowboy
then as a policeman knocked the door
And fired multiple shots through it at two lawmakers
and a Spinal bifida daughter who was only saved
by her mother taking the bullets aimed at her
He then shot dead a woman and spouse
Who had put through pro-trans legislation
To protect the vulnerable
He was a republican ardent Trump supporter
But the BBC has been suppressing this information
In the light of our new war footing and our ally
Whose alleged Commander in Chief
Spent all evening forgetting Minnesota
And praising USA victories including Vietnam
It was some birthday Donald
Shame it spoilt by some bad Intel, dead democrats
A middle-east slowly turning to rubble
It could be that the party is over now
The war just beginning inside and outside your borders
Or as I my family always said after WW2
Keep the Yanks in front of you
Never behind as they cannot be trusted
God Bless America
Donald Trump’s 5th Amendment Dream
I was riding on Epstein’s Jet
When I thought I spied some hired hands . . . [ha, ha, ha]
[Start again:]
I was riding on Epstein’s Jet
When I thought I spied some hired hands
I yelled for Ghislaine Maxwell
I have yuh understand
She came running down the aisle
She said, “Girls, forget the whale
Look on over yonder
Cut the engine, change the girl
Haul on the Slovenian gal”
We sang that melody
Like all tough grifters do
When they are all at sea
Let’s execute Obama on Capitol Hill
“I think I’ll call it Trumpland”
I said as we hit land
I took a deep breath
I fell down, I could not stand
Captain Epstein he started
Writing up some deeds
He said, “Let’s buy property in Mar-o-Lago Land
And start buying the place with blackmail funds”
Just then this cop comes down the street
Crazy as a loon
He throws Jeffrey in jail
For carryin’on with girls as you do
Ah me I bust him out
Don’t even ask me how
I went to get some help
I was paid by a Oligarch’s cash cow
Who directed me to follow
The Kremlins sums
Where people carried signs around
Saying, “Ban the democrat bums”
I jumped right into line
Sayin’, “I hope that I’m not late”
When I realized I hadn’t handled
A hired hand for five days straight
I went into a restaurant
Lookin’ for the crook
I told them I was the writer
Of a famous business book
The waitress she was a model
She wore a powder blue cape
I ordered some hired hands, I said
“Could you please make that fake”
Just then the whole kitchen exploded
From fake news
the truth was flying everywhere
And I left without my dues
Now, I didn’t mean to be crazy
But I went into a bank
To get some bail for my latest scam
And the boy I left back in the tank
They asked me for some collateral
And I pulled down my pants
They threw me in the spa
When up comes this girl from France
Who invited me to Jeffrey’s island
I went, but she had a friend
Who massaged me good
And rubbed my boots
And I was in Mar-o-Lago land
Well, I bid upon the White House
With the U.S. flag upon display
I said, “Could you help me out
I got some friends like Diddy been put away”
The man says, “Get out of here
I’ll tear you limb from limb”
I said, “You know they refused Manson, too”
He said, “You’re not Him
Get out of here before I break your bones
Fox News says I’m your daddy now”
I decided to have him arrested
And I went looking for a bent cop
I ran right outside
And I hopped inside a cab
I went out the other door
James Bond said, “Let him have his golf course”
As he saw me leap a off a speeding golf buggy
And a long black limo that stood
Parked across from a building
Advertising the MAGA brotherhood
I ran right through the front door
Like a true American hero does
But it was just a prison cell
And the man asked me who I was
I repeated that my friends
Were all in jail, with a sigh
He gave me his card DOJ main man
He said, “Call me if they don’t die”
I shook his hand and said goodbye
Ran out to the street
When a drone came down the road
And knocked me off my feet
A pay phone was ringing
It just about blew my mind
When I picked it up and said hello
Putin was on the line
Well, by this time I was fed up
At tryin’ to make a deal
At bringin’ back any tariffs
For my friends and QANON
I decided to nip a coin
Like either heads or tails
Would let me know if I should go
Back to Mar-o-Lago or back to jail
So I hocked my presidential suit
And I got a coin to flip
It came up tails
It rhymed with distraction fails
So I made it back to the ship of fools
Well, I got back and took
The impeachment note off the mast
I was ripping it to shreds
When this coastguard boat went past
They asked me my name
And I said, “Captain Kidd”
They believed me but
They wanted to know
What exactly it was that I did
I said for the Emperor of Russia
I was employed
They let me go right away
They were very paranoid
Well, the last I heard of Captain Epstein
He was hanging from a sheet
Ghislaine was given a pardon
By the Sheriff of the DOJ for me
But the funniest thing was
When I was leavin’ the big white house
I saw three horses a-pocalypse’
They were all heading my way
I asked the captain what his name was
And how come he didn’t drive a truck
He said his name was Lucifer
I just said, “Let’s do a deal bruv.”
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